"I went to bed dreaming you hard, woke with your name like tears on my lips"

It is now almost 1 in the morning, and I am wide awake. You'd think, after spending almost 12 hours reading Portrait of the Lady, until my head was pounding and I thought my eyes were going to fall out of my head, that would not be the case. Somehow, it is. I enjoyed the novel more than I thought I would, though the ending absolutely sucks. So much for female empowerment. Lets all run back to our sleazebag husbands for wont of propriety. Though I think next week I will space out my time in a saner fashion, if Dracula is anywhere near as long as Portrait. Though Dracula has got to be more enjoyable than 636 pages of Henry James in two, almost three sittings. Also, reading in Blackwells makes for a nice change of pace from the library. Somehow, I am less distracted. Which, weirdly, goes against my usual habits. In any case, I can also drink chai while I read. They frown on that in libraries.

I should carve out some time to write emails, send postcards. I always mean to, and then the time just..disappears. Trust, at least, that I'm thinking of you, even if I'm sucky at the whole communicating thing as often as I would like.

Other things to do: sit in a graveyard, for another Oxford description. Contrastingly, sit in the University Parks. (so pretty!) Then write these things up. Go for more walks. Take pictures. Delete old pictures from camera so sim card has room for new pictures. Take a yoga class? Write actual letters. Go out on weeknights. Spend less money. Learn to cook things other than pasta. Not get sick (er). Take Bri's advice.

Obama is leading in the polls, more substantially than before, it would appear. I am still waiting for my absentee ballot. Fairfield Town Hall, why are you so slow?

I am discovering you can forget about a lot when you're away. Alternately, I still choose to remember too much?

One of these days I'll bury him/them for good. Really. Just a matter of time.

“Learn to ask for what you want. The worst people can do is not give you what you ask for which is precisely where you were before you asked.” — Peter McWilliams

^A mentality I should embody. I'd probably be better off I did. Instead of clinging to the belief that somehow asking, and being refused, is worse than never asking at all.


I do wish more of the trees changed color here. And orchards/apple picking. Even in Oxford, there is nothing quite like a New England autumn.